This April, I decided to participate in April Fool's. Which is kind of like saying I participated in Earth Day because let's face it, April Fool's is just the most asshole holiday in the calender year and just as important to celebrate as Earth Day.
For my hat-trick, I would tell everyone who could read that I became sober over the weekend. Sheriff found probably the most ratchet nas-t wig at Goodwill and I bought it, along with some fake grass which isn't important to this story but holy shit I own fake grass now. Where's the most social place to post something that can be seen by hundreds of people you barely know? Facebook. Give or take the strippers I added who I know can't read.
So I posted this picture:
and this status to go with it:
Of course my status and photo were met with positive responses. From complete strangers.
and by strangers, I do include but not limit to: people i've known my entire life, my family, and a stripper.
The simple touch in this is the quote. Very subtle, all comforting. Said to a serial killer, perhaps not the best line of action if he's started to get in to God-like untouchable narcissism; but still. Very kind. My personal favorite was the single post I got on my timeline:
You have been weighed, you have been measured, and you have been found wanting my D.
A bit later I posted an picture of myself drinking with the title, "April Fool's, my friends." and it didn't stop them. Yeah, no, seriously. I'm still getting inbox messages of congratulations. This would all be a great leap for mankind if any of it had actually happened. What kind of asshole would trick these kind people in to thinking I've come out of a horrible rut? What kind of prick would thank those same people for their kind words of encouragement, knowing it was all bullshit?
Me, of course. In a $3 wig.